That Was The Year That Was (Part5)
Wednesday January 20, 2016
Its the second week in August 2015 the sun is shining and....

That’s where the good news ends. Doing a bit of research I’ve found there are a few theories as to where the phrase ‘its all gone pear shaped’ comes from. The most likely is it was used during WW2 when training pilots tried to fly loops and things didn’t go to plan their vapour trails ending in the shape of a pear. Whatever the origin there isn’t a better phrase that perfectly sums up the majority of the final three weeks of the eighth month of the year.

It all started for me with a trip to Brisbane Road, slogging my way up five flights of stairs to the press box in the clouds I was greeted by a friendly face saying “didn’t they tell you there was a lift?” By the time I’d got my breath back Barnet were 2-0 down and I had the distinct feeling the rest of the day wasn’t going to go well. That turned into an understatement as the Edinburgh Monarchs put our lads to the sword and some. What could go wrong did. Heat 1 took four restarts, Captain K became rather too acquainted with the third bend fence and the Black and White came to grief when the ‘A‘ Train was derailed. A quick 520 mile round trip to Plymouth did little to redress the balance as Captain K proved how unbalanced we were scoring 19 of the teams 38 points on another disappointing night.

The visit of Workington did produce a much needed win even without the hobbling NBJ. The lad unfortunately falling foul of one of the few sporting injuries that can’t help but raise a smirk amongst supporters despite the pain. I must say if I’d been diagnosed with a broken coccyx I’d definitely turn it into a lower back injury to save myself endless Frankie Howerd type “ooh er Mrs” innuendoes. By the way if younger readers are unsure who I’m referring to look the great man up on You Tube you won’t be disappointed. Back on the track Captain K and Rene Bach enjoyed a titanic tussle in Heat 10 Eddie calmly saying afterwards “ yeah it was a bit tight, I caught my clutch lever on his shoulder,” as you do!

The other highlight of the night was the announcement asking if anyone could give Rene Bach’s mechanic a lift back to Cumbria. Can you imagine a football crowd being treated to “can someone give our physio a lift home after the match?” Before you ask I’m assuming someone obliged as he wasn’t still there when Ipswich came to visit the following Saturday.

Now I admit I have been known to poke a little fun at the agricultural tendencies of our near neighbours in the past. In my defence though I did spend 12 years working with an Ipswich fan who did have a subscription to Tractor Monthly and took great pleasure in telling me about John Deeres every time a new copy came out. Anyway as I prepared for the annual week in the sun it was the Tractors that left the car park smiling despite another max from Captain K. So onwards to September but not before I’d fallen off my sunbed in Madeira....